…If anyone ever tells me what that means.
I’m sitting here with a Dixie cup of noodles, a diet lipton green ice tea, and fuzzy bathrobe and slippers. Yes, I’m pretty comfortable. Quite frankly, I’m in thinking mode. Thinking about what’s going to be happening to me, and my relationship in the next few months. I’ve been on tons of USMC WIVES websites, and blogs, and forums, just reading, researching, trying to find comfort in what I’m feeling, and trying to prepare myself for what’s coming, and how I’m going to feel, but every blog, forum, website, and even person I’ve spoken to has told me that there’s no way to prepare for how I’m going to feel. Is that so? How am I supposed to survive if I can’t even fathom the amount of pain I might feel when he leaves. He’s not even getting officially deployed yet, so… what’s going on with me… Then it’s like the military is trying to tease us girlfriends and wives. They leave us for 18 weeks or so, come back for a few DAYS, and then leave for job training for another few months… What the hell… A close mutual friend of mine and my boyfriend’s has gone Army. He leaves next week, and honestly, I feel like if his relationship falls apart with his girlfriend, that it’ll freak me out, and make me feel as if mine will fall apart as well, but at the same time, I have so much faith, and trust, and love for this man that I can’t even come to the thought of leaving him, or him leaving me for that matter. I don’t want to sound crazy or anything, but I’m just saying…I love him that much… He means everything to me… And seeing him achieve his goals, and lifelong dream means the world to me also. AND being there beside him while he achieves his lifelong dream makes me so happy. I can’t explain it… I hope there are going to be more Marine Corp wives, and girlfriends, who’ll put imput into this… Because I don’t want to go through this alone…
P.S… I just spilled my noodles everywhere /:
Guess I saw that coming.
Photo:
My Future Marine and I on the way home from his High School Graduation.
I love you<3
